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I RAISE MY DAUGHTER & LOVE MY SON

Dionne Simpson-Amuah • Mar 06, 2019
I remember hearing this phrase many moons ago, maybe sometime in my early 20’s. I can’t remember exactly who it was that said it, but it was an admission filled with no regrets.

I didn’t understand it at first. Surely, raising your daughter had to incorporate love as well, so if the boys were only being ‘loved’ then surely they were the ones missing out? In theory, somewhat, but what I didn’t understand was that girls (in a general sense) weren’t receiving the same tenderness as their male siblings.


As the conversation continued, I found myself getting agitated. This was an older woman, who should by now see the error of her ways, but she almost continued talking with a hint or pride.


Growing up, I was annoyed about all of the things I had to do, whilst my eldest brother was left to do as he pleased. I remember endless Saturday nights where I would be stood at the ironing board watching evening TV and making my way through bags of clothes. I hated the injustice. HATED IT! Honestly, I would’ve been less riled if the chores and orders were given out equally.


Mind you, it wasn’t always that way. Saturday morning, we were both given our chores which were laborious and tedious for a small child. My chore was polishing and my brothers was hoovering. Give me that chore now & I would knock it all out in less than 15 mins. Back then it felt like the most unfair thing anyone could’ve given me to do.


For me, I think things began to change when I turned 10 or 11. Suddenly, I had to scrub my socks, wash my underwear, scrub the necks of my shirts along with the rest of my child slave labour chores (I say in jest, before my parents see and get in their feelings! Lol!).


I was forced to watch my mum cook, which again I just couldn’t understand. Why isn’t my brother standing here also? Why doesn’t he need to learn to cook too? I the started to notice other little things too. Men would be served first with the big oval plates, and weren’t required to always sit at the table. Meanwhile, I had to act as the waitress which angered me. Why were the males given special treatment? I couldn’t see anything that warranted this special treatment? What were they doing over and above the women? The older I got, I think the more resentful I became.


Once I became an adult, I realised the benefits of the extra tuition I received. I was domesticated, could cook my ass off and was the hostess with mostest. I knew how to conduct myself in public and you never saw me getting messy in the streets with any passa (drama). So yaaaaaay gold star for me!


But what about all of the men who are not provided with the same life skills? Is it any coincidence that we have certain relationship and societal problems within the community?


I don’t want to spoil the podcast, but we do discuss the range of issues that arise from ‘raising our daughters and loving our sons’.


Have a listen and share your comments below!


Thank you for reading & listening!


Take care of yourselves an especially our children.



Dionne xx

Co-Parenting featuring Aaron (Raising Boys 2 Men)

by Dionne Simpson • 13 Jul, 2022
personally, as soon as I was faced with the notion that my relationship with my ex-husband would not survive, we discussed at length how we would conduct ourselves. We discussed finances, how we would deal with future relationships, mutually agreed on how we would parent and left no stone unturned. our daughters well-being was the priority and everything else came afterwards. yet, despite these discussions and writing things on paper, we still faced some of the same hurdles that millions of other co-parents do. sometimes it is nearly impossible to avoid friction at some point in the journey, particularly when everything is fresh and new to everyone. one question I always ask myself when it comes to co-parenting in the face of adversity is, 'does this benefit my daughter?' . if the answer is no, I just won't allow myself to behave or respond in a way that is detrimental to her or the co-parenting relationship. does that mean I back down? no. but what it means is that I approach all conversations and disagreements respectfully and as calmly as possible. a breakdown in healthy communication gets neither party anywhere, and if both are sincere and care enough, the Childs needs will always come first. realistically, Things may not always go smoothly when co-parenting. It helps to be clear about what your most important goals are for the future. Here are two that you might want to consider: To commit to supporting your children in having a free and uncomplicated relationship with the other parent. To keep whatever feelings you have about each other separate from your co-parenting relationship. These principles can serve as foundations for everything you do as co-parents.

Why Quitting My Corporate Role Was My Biggest Act Of Self Care

by Dionne Simpson • 06 Jul, 2022
this episode is probably the hardest one I have ever published, but quitting my corporate role was one of my biggest acts of self care. even as I type this, I am feeling quite sad and vulnerable. nothing has been more damaging to my self esteem than working in the insurance industry. some people may watch, read or listen to this episode and say that I am a fool for staying as long as I did, or that maybe I should have taken this company to an employment tribunal. however, back then terms such as 'microaggressions' or 'covert racism' were not that popular and how I would even build a case against them? how could I cite that their refusal to give me a blackberry to do my job efficiently was a sign of racism? had this been in more recent times, maybe things may have been different, but I am also a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. I had people close to me scorn me for leaving without finding something else, but 'who the cap fits, let them wear it!'. I was drained, exhausted, broken and I mentally could not go on. despite the negative responses I received, all that mattered to me was that my then husband was supportive of my decisions and he backed me all the way. I must credit him for his understanding at that time and I am grateful for the space he gave me to get back on my feet.
Dionne Love Laid Bare Podcast

The Orgasm Gap

by Dionne Simpson • 22 Jun, 2022
Episode 2, season 8! The Orgasm Gap

How Numerology Can Help You ft Lorraine Whyte

by Dionne Simpson-Amuah • 21 Apr, 2021
In this week's episode I am joined by returnee guest, Lorraine Whyte, to discuss the benefits and insight that numerology can give you, alongside identifying any trauma that may need to be worked upon. Discussion points: -Numerology and its definition -How numerology offers insight to your life's purpose and beyond -Can you change your life's plan? -The truth about manifesting -Dionne gets her own personal reading & forecast for 2021 -Trauma and karmic lessons -Numerology for business -Angel numbers

Soul Ties & Sexual Healing ft Tay Burke (Spiritual Alchemist)

by Dionne Simpson • 07 Apr, 2021
Quite simply, sex with the right person that aligns with you can be a very fulfilling experience. UNFORTUNATELY, THE MESSAGES THAT WE HAVE RECEIVED FROM SOCIETY, CULTURE AND RELIGION MAY HAVE ALTERED OUR VIEW OF SEX AND NOT ALWAYS IN THE RIGHT WAY.

Becoming Dad: The Untold Story

by Dionne Simpson • 02 Apr, 2021
We’ve discussed having a stepfather from a child’s perspective, absentee fathers (again from the child’s perspective) as well as the challenges of co-parenting. For this episode and blog, I wanted to talk to the men who had struggled for various reasons whilst having their children relatively young. As I was writing this blog, my uncle just happened to be at my parents’ house, so I invited him to share his thoughts on the topic. He had his first son at 21 and struggled to maintain a relationship with his eldest son until he was old enough to come and look for him.

Understanding & Defining Spirituality Ft Lorraine Whyte

by Dionne Simpson • 24 Mar, 2021
As i mention at the top of this episode, i have wanted to explore this topic for a while. i know the limits of my spiritual knowledge and therefore needed to have this discussion with someone who knows their stuff unapologetically. growing up in a christian family, attending church every sunday and going to a faith based school surely should have kept me within the borders of my religion. yet, from a young age i just knew that there were some things that didn't sit right or make sense to me.

A Dose Of Dionne - The Games People Play

by Dionne Simpson • 17 Mar, 2021
in this episode of a dose of dionne, i reflect on some of the experiences i have had with meeting new people. Having been 'out of the game' for a while, i don't think i genuinely had a good idea about the interactions people have in the dating world. i can honestly say that i have met some truly amazing people and each person has given me some food for thought or added to my growth as a person. I refer to a previous episode with victor granville called the search for real love which goes a bit deeper into some of the things i mention in this episode. Please have a listen if you need to!

How To Be A Conscious Parent

by Dionne Simpson • 10 Mar, 2021
In this weeks episode I am joined by Nicole Henry, child psychologist and therapist as we discuss how we can adopt better ways in parenting. you can follow or get into contact with nicole on instagram or via her website - www.thenicolehenry.com the episode is available to listen below:

A Dose Of Dionne - Behind Her Eyes Spoiler Alert!!!

by Dionne Simpson • 03 Mar, 2021
For me to dedicate a whole episode to a TV series, my regular listeners will know that I must be quite rattled. Lol! Behind her eyes was a brilliant series, a frustrating series and an ‘Oh My God’ type of psychological series. This is a spoiler alert so if you have not watched the series or if you intend on watching the series, please do not listen to this episode. I repeat, do not listen to this episode!! This is a VERY candid, off the cuff episode so please be warned there will be some profanity used because the series was that good!!!
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